Surrogacy Series #12- Third Trimester Festivities

Hi friends! I am back to blogging about our amazing surrogacy journey. Finishing this series is on my summer goals list because I really don’t want to forget this stuff!!! I am already forgetting how small Ivy was when she was born! Time goes TOO FAST!

In my last post, I shared some of our beautiful maternity surrogacy pictures. Once our baby shower and pictures were done, time really started to fly! The sights and sounds of the upcoming holidays started to spring up in shopping malls and in our home.

It all felt a little surreal. The year before during this time in the year, we were waiting for a “I am in labor” call from our birthmom. I remember Thanksgiving especially- it was very hot and we spent it at Justin’s aunt and uncle’s house by the beach. I kept glancing at my phone.

Now a year later, another woman was carrying a baby we would be adding to our family, but this time the baby shared our genes. It was hard to grieve what was lost and to wrap my head around what was going on. It played some mind games with me if I am being honest. Everything felt so very familiar, but so very different at the same time.

But one thing was for sure- this Thanksgiving we were SO thankful for our sweet baby girl. We hosted the day at our house and Justin made the tastiest turkey I have ever tasted. God bless the day I married a chef.


Stacy started having some pregnancy complications the day after Thanksgiving that lasted until birth. I will write about that wild ride (it all ended up being fine!) in my next post.

One highlight during this season was our 3D ultrasound! We invited our families and we all got to sit in a big room and watch Ivy wiggle and move. It was so surreal to see her little profile and tiny fingers and toes. But the most memorable part of that experience was that during the ultrasound, we picked her name!

We had been really struggling to choose a name for her. After all, we had just named a baby girl the year before and we had chosen a name we really loved and gave her my grandma’s middle name as her middle name. It was difficult to go back to the drawing board. We wanted something unique and that had a special meaning for this journey and this little girl.

Once Justin saw her face on the ultrasound, Justin turned and whispered to me, “What about the name Ivy?” I immediately liked how unique it was, but wanted to make sure it had a meaning that meant something to me. I ended up looking it up and read that it meant “faithfulness.” I teared up as I reflected on the faithfulness of God and the faithfulness of our dear Stacy. It is a quality I want her to share.

It was HER name.


As the weeks passed by, we enjoyed some fun over Christmas time. Stacy gave us the most thoughtful gift. She got a stuffed elephant (the theme of the baby room), with a recording of her heartbeat from the ultrasound. I loved it!!

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Again, the Christmas season (especially the anniversary of our adoption ending) was tricky water to navigate. Justin and I had to constantly check in with each other daily on the wide array of emotions we were experiencing. I also had to fight a growing sense of dread that something horrible was going to happen and this happy time would end in heartbreak once again.

It was hard to know how to pray.

I was so tired and just couldn’t wait to hold my sweet Ivy in my arms.

But we still had a few months to go….

1 Comment

1 Comment on Surrogacy Series #12- Third Trimester Festivities

  1. Sharon Kent says:

    Bonnie-your writing is all-encompassing. Your feelings at this time echo ours. How do we pray? Do we have fear of the unknown over joy over this fast-growing baby soon to be born? Is God really still watching over us every moment of every day to make sure everything is perfect? Do we have faith in our doctors or buy into the scary statistics that could come about? Let us us just say GOD IS GOOD!!!!

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